Responses to Stress are Often Unhealthy
A common denominator in people’s lives today is stress, but many people have responses to stress that are unhealthy. And really, we all tend toward our default responses to stress that are generally selfish, defensive, sinful – well, you get the picture.
When a sampling is bent over by the wind, it will bounce back unless the stress lasts too long and breaks it.
If you go into the woods and find a sapling about 10 feet tall, you will find that if you bend it and hold it there for a few minutes, it will totally bounce back when you let it go into its upright position. But if you bend it and hold it for a long time, and then bend it some more, and then some more, it will eventually break. When you let it go, it won’t bounce back – it is broken. This is what stress and overload activities can do to our lives if we don’t learn how to let the “tree” bounce back.
Seven Unhealthy Responses to Stress to Avoid
1. Escape: This is the response that in short means “I’m out of here!” My dad used this coping mechanism when he deserted our family when I was ten years old. He literally changed his name, took our one car, left the state, and we didn’t see him again for years. (But that is another story!)
2. Over-indulging in something: We automatically default to thinking of this category as either being drinking or eating to assuage our stressful feelings. But over-indulging can also include other things like shopping, working, preoccupation with sex or beauty or fitness, applause, achievement, etc. Do any of these resonate with you?
3. Deer in headlights syndrome: Sometimes a coping mechanism will result in us just going numb and going about tasks automatically. It puts you in a “functioning” mode but not a healthy living mode at all.
4. Attack others: Too often mature adults will resort to criticizing, making snide remarks, or gossiping about someone else when, in fact, they are under stress about something totally separate from the person they are attacking. It’s the not-so-comical syndrome of dad having a bad performance review at work and then coming home to tell his wife that she never makes a good supper for him. So then the mom yells at junior for leaving his soccer shoes in the middle of the hallway, and junior kicks the dog. Perfect examples of attacking others to cope with stress.
5. Change circumstances: Stress in relationships can be so overpowering that it can make a person want to change that circumstance. This could result in changing locations, leaving a job, getting a divorce, and other major life-changing decisions.
6. Gutting it out: Sometimes a person’s learned-response is to just take the lumps – just endure it. But like waves, it keeps coming and the stress is not being resolved. There certainly is no rest for their hurting spirit.In a similar vein would be avoidance – “just ignore the stress and it will go away” idea. This is often learned from childhood to not deal with stresses head-on but to let them fester rather than handling them Biblically like Matthew 18:15 – 16 tells you – to go directly to the person who has sinned against you to address the problem.
7. Becoming violent: Road rage, gang murders, wife battery, or even a lesser form like slamming a door are all harmful coping strategies for handling stress. In fact, the attempt to cope with stress in a violent way actually results in more stress for others involved or present. This might be the most harmful of all responses.
What are Your Default Responses to Stress?
Which of these are you guilty of? What is your default response usually? Come on – it’s confession time! Knowledge is the first step in correcting a behavior. A change in what you eat is a step in the right direction. Check out Six Foods to Help Manage Your Stress.
Now you are probably thinking “yea, yea – but what’s the transforming solution to responding better to stress?” I’m glad you asked! You will learn “God’s Remedy for Transforming Stress into Rest” in my new e-book that is being launched soon. And I’ll probably post another excerpt too. So stay tuned.
If this struck a chord with you, please leave me a comment below and tell me your favorite good coping mechanism for stress. Also, I would be so appreciative if you share this post on your favorite social network site. I’ve made it stress-free for you with the link buttons below. Remember, your health is your true wealth and that totally includes healthy responses to stress!
Check out 7 unhealthy responses to stress to avoid @amyhagerup http://bit.ly/cMDQZW #UTribe
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Pingback: amyhagerup.com » Blog Archive » Six Foods To Help You Manage Stress
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Pingback: Blogs not to miss | Grow With Stacy
Pingback: Blogs not to Miss! | Grow With Stacy
Rather than offering a tip for healthy response to stress, I’ll just admit I’m too guilty of most of the bad ones you listed!!! It helps to be confronted with it, though! So thanks for the great info!!
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amyhagerup Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 9:57 pm
Hi Charlotte, you made me laugh out loud with yoru comment. I hope the stress in your home is going down! blessings, amy
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RT @amyhagerup: Seven Unhealthy Responses to Stress to Avoid http://bit.ly/cMDQZW Real insightful tips. Thanks Mark and Amy, God Bless you!
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I think that to some degree or another we all are guilty of each one depending on the type of stress it is. I think that I often go with the escape option as a natural defense. I will bury myself in a novel, a project, or something else to keep my mind busy.
.-= Stacy´s last blog ..How Do You Deal With Grief =-.
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amyhagerup Reply:
August 17th, 2010 at 6:06 pm
Hi Stacy, This reflection is so true. Escape is probably one of the safer responses – and we mustn’t discount that sometimes we just need to pull away and “regroup” and “recharge.” And there is nothing wrong with that. The better we know ourselves and what we need, the healthier our emotions can be. Blessings, Amy
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Check out 7 unhealthy responses to stress to avoid @amyhagerup http://bit.ly/cMDQZW #UTribe
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amyhagerup Reply:
November 5th, 2010 at 11:10 pm
Hey Kenny, Thanks for the syndication! I’ll be in touch. Blessings, Amy
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What have been MY responses? Well most of them in the past. I’m a little better than I used to be but still have a fair amount of work to do on that. This is a great article that has challenged me in a positive way.
Marty´s last [type] ..Letting go your Outcomes – The pinball effect
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amyhagerup Reply:
February 15th, 2011 at 1:22 am
Thanks, Marty. I’m so glad you stopped by and commented to. I am about to launch a new ebook called “God’s Remedy for Transforming Stress into Rest” if that interests you. What you read was an excerpt from the ebook. Blessings, Amy
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I enjoyed the exerpts and am looking forward to reading your ebook, Amy! Plenty of stress in our lives right now.
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amyhagerup Reply:
March 22nd, 2011 at 7:46 pm
Yes, we are well-acquainted with stress right now too! Thanks for stopping by and commenting. The eBook will be published next week! Stay tuned. blessings, Amy
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